As you all know, we do not have a maid neither do we stay very near (walking distance I meant) my parents or David’s parents so having either side of the parents as back up to pick up the kids can be almost be considered a definite NO NO.  6 months has since past but I am still trying to work out the timing portion and thank goodness I have a job which is pretty fixed when it comes to working hours.

Now that Rayner is in the afternoon session which he will still be when he attends primary 2 next year, our timing will be pretty fixed and routine say for the next 1.5 years.  Only when RayAnne goes into primary 1 in year 2011, she will be in the afternoon session but Rayner will already be in the morning session then my major headache will start but we shall handle that when it comes.  We will tackle one problem at a time,  right now, every morning, David will bring RayAnne down to the car park to fetch the car while I will walk Rayner to the student care centre which is now by the way downstairs our home.  After that, we will both send RayAnne to her childcare centre which is about 5 mins away.  Then after dropping our princess off, David will drop me off at Mandy’s place where I will hitch a ride to work everyday.  That solves most of my transport and timing problem.  There there is the going home part.  5.30pm on the dot, you will see me leaving my office to catch the Jurong East train home and if nothing goes wrong, by 6.15pm I should reach Yew Tee and it takes me 10 minutes to walk home.  Rayner’s school bus will reach the waiting point sometime around 6.50pm and RayAnne’s school bus will reach our place sometime around 7.00pm.

I usually still have time to go home and change into home clothes and slippers before walking to Rayner’s bus waiting point.  After fetching Rayner, we usually have to wait another good 15 mins downstairs at our place for RayAnne’s bus to come.   Childcare bus operators tend to drive more slowly and careful because they are ferrying much younger children as compared to the giant bus Rayner is taking.  And our Uncle Teo is a very fatherly figure who is very cautious when ferrying the kids around.  The longest we ever waited downstairs was 30 mins. And when it rains, he will drive even slower.   Instead of letting Rayner wait with me downstairs the whole entire time, I have decided to make better use of the time so I tried out something new, something I have never done before.  Right after fetching Rayner, we go straight home instead of proceeding to RayAnne’s bus waiting point. Once home,  he will go about and do his routine like bathing, watching TV/DVD or playing his PSP all ALONE at home while I trottle downstairs and wait for RayAnne.

I initially felt really bad leaving him ALONE at home but David explained that Rayner has to learn to be independent and it will only be for 10 – 15 mins and I will only be downstairs.  The first couple of days I tried leaving him ALONE at home, I was more worried and scared than Rayner.  He was like ok lor and he actually enjoys the time alone because he can take his own time showering and after showering, he would be on the sofa playing his PSP (having a whale of a time).  And there were so many times, when I came back with RayAnne, he was still in the shower.  But I did tell him that if he ever felt scared, he should call me and I will be there to talk to him and never to open the door to strangers or attempt to take the key, open the door and leave the house.  He was aware of what he should and should not do.  I just hope I am not doing something terribly wrong here.  Sometimes I think, am I being too over-protective of the kids especially Rayner because he is a boy and he has to learn to become strong and independent. 

I haven’t mentioned that David had recently been to an interview and if everything goes well and smooth as planned.  He will start to travel extensively like 70% of the time  and each trip will be for about a month to 2 months but when he isn’t travelling, he will be home because there isn’t an office here to house all the engineers, then he can be the house man when he isn’t travelling to take care of me and the kids.  And of course the money $$ returns will be really attractively (although we know $$ cannot buy everything but we felt we have to do something while we were still young and save as much as we can for the kids’ future).  So so attractive that I can be a tai tai liao but you know me liao, I look nothing like a tai tai, infact, I am so plain looking, you may think I am the taitai, kakia. 

LOST TIME with the kids is also another issue David was also worried about when we talked about this job offer but I assured him, his relationship with the kids and me should be strong enough to weather anything, in fact, absense makes the heart fonder and in our case it is very true.  Everytime he goes away, the kids miss him alot and when he is back he will always try to do things with them and that usually manages to bring the kids closer to his heart.  At least I see him trying…..A for EFFORT…..actually, I hate for him to travel, I really wish he can be here with me to weather anything, be it bringing the kids swimming or going to the zoo or movies but I cannot hold him back.  I can see that he is now really not happy in his current job and is dragging his feet to work these days and if he is up to a new challenge, I want to be there for him and support him all the way and the only way I can do that is to take good care the home and kids when he is not around.

What I am trying to say here is that, there will come a time when I will be the only person taking care of the kids while David is working hard overseas to bring back the $$ and mentally I have to be very strong to weather everything.  I may even have to fall sick lesser than I usually do since there are no MCs with this new role I am taking up.  Am now thinking of ways to make life easier and simplier for myself. 

We ever considered moving nearer to my mum so she can do the cooking while me and kids can go back everyday for dinner.  She can also help me fetch the kids too but we are now pretty deeply rooted in choa chu kang meaning, school’s all settled and kids have all settled in and are enjoying school and I really hate to make the transition.  So that idea is out.  My mother in law can’t help much too especially now because she is started to have knee cap problem and is now walking rather awakwardly.  If I continue my solo routine, the only problem would be what happens when I fall ill and is too sick to cook and take care of the kids??? All these whys, hows and then???? has left some evidence on my head, I’ve noticed lots and lots of white hair sprouting.